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Decoded Love

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  • Attachment Quiz
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An anxious preoccupied man expressing anxiety.
Your Attachment Style Is:

Anxious Preoccupied

Thank you for taking the Attachment Style Quiz. You have an anxious-preoccupied attachment style. You value relationships and enjoy connecting with others, but relationships also cause you anxiety. You have an underlying fear of abandonment, which causes you to become "clingy" and attach to others fairly quickly.


How Did This Develop?

Attachments begin early in childhood

The anxious attachment style develops when a child experiences inconsistent care during their upbringing. This means that either one or both caregivers were emotionally available to the child but unable to provide a consistent level of support. The inconsistency could be due to various reasons, such as a supportive but absent parent or parents who were emotionally connected but had busy work schedules. This causes the child to develop a fear of abandonment. This carries over into adulthood, where they project this fear of abandonment onto their partners. 

Thoughts and beliefs

Individuals with an anxious preoccupied attachment style often believe that they are unworthy, unloved, and unsafe. They tend to fear rejection, abandonment, and loneliness. They unconsciously project these beliefs onto their adult relationships and worry their partner may abandon them. They believe that seeking the approval of others and people-pleasing will prevent this fear from resurfacing.


Does any of this sound like you?

  • You don't like being alone and fear you'll be alone forever.


  • You feel anxious when someone doesn't text or call you back immediately.


  • Panic or worry when your partner starts pulling away or withdrawing. You worry they might leave or break up with you. 




  • Want a committed relationship and want your partner to prioritize you.


  • You expect your partner always to be available, and know exactly what you need.


  • Jump to conclusions easily and think your partner might be cheating.

  • You rely a lot on others and are co-dependant.


  • You people please and put yourself last. 


  • Like to be seen, feel wanted, and enjoy the thrill of being chased.




Attachment styles relationship coach helping you have a secure attachment


Anxious Preoccupied

constantly connect

constantly connect

constantly connect

You might text or call your partner frequently even when they don't respond. You may also be fixated and obsessed with their social media activity or the places they frequent.

Make threats

constantly connect

constantly connect

You might threaten to end the relationship and leave your partner even though you don't intend to. 

Play Mind Games

constantly connect

Play Mind Games

You may try to evoke jealousy in your partner, pretend not to care, or delay your responses to their messages.

Become critical

Become critical

Play Mind Games

You might become passive-aggressive and find indirect ways to get back at your partner.

keep a record

Become critical

Seek attention

You take note of actions, such as delayed responses to text messages or things that don't meet your expectations.

Seek attention

Become critical

Seek attention

You might excessively seek attention from others or be quick to move on from a relationship. 


A happy couple smiling.

Anxious Preoccupied Relationships

How your relationships are affected

As a result of your attachment style, you might be attracting people who are emotionally unavailable and aren't in alignment with you. You'll find yourself over-giving and under-receiving, wanting closeness only to be met with distance. You might spend night after night worrying about being alone and never finding someone to stay with you in the long run.  You might find it difficult to find a steady relationship and you crave a partner who is consistent in their actions and can give you reassurance, validation, and connection. 


To have a secure attachment a few things you will want to work on are:

  • Getting to know yourself and what your specific needs are.
  • Improving your communication skills and placing healthier expectations.  
  • Learning how to ask your partner to meet your needs while meeting them yourself.
  • Breaking through negative thinking and beliefs.
  • Learning how to set boundaries.
  • Emotionally regulating and reassuring yourself when you start to feel insecure.

Change is possible

Your attachment style may have developed as a child but is not permanent. You can take control of your healing and change your attachment style into a secure one. At Decoded Love, you will receive all the necessary tools and guidance to help you achieve this transformation. You can become secure in a matter of weeks.


The Secure Love Style Program

create change in just a few weeks

create change in just a few weeks

create change in just a few weeks

Women on laptop doing coaching course

It can be challenging to navigate relationships with an anxious attachment style. The coaching program is personalized to help you overcome these challenges and feel more confident and worthy in your relationships. Healing the wounds in your subconscious mind is the key to creating positive change, and the coaching program offers scientifically proven methods to help you break through limiting beliefs and destructive patterns in just a few weeks. Decoded Love Coaching is here to support you every step of the way. 

heal and become secure

create change in just a few weeks

create change in just a few weeks

A couple sitting on the couch doing an online coaching course.

The relationship coaching program will help you to:

  • Understand your needs, emotional patterns, and triggers.
  • Improve communication and boundary skills.
  • Navigate relationships with less fear and anxiety.
  • Attract relationships that make you feel connected and valued.
  • Have healthier relationship habits.


Learn more

Transform your love life

The Secure Love Style Program is the fastest and most effective way to improve your love life and help you have a secure attachment style. Change your attachment style and become your secure self!

Ready to transform your life and create relationships that thrive?

Yes I'm ready

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